I know some mums struggle a lot with coming to terms with having baby number two, All the worries and questions that you can have and whether you feel like you will have enough time or even be enough for both babies. This can send a lot of expecting mums into a whirlwind of anxiety and stress. Something you defiantly do not want to be while carrying your baby. I know from experience that the stress can get too much. But importantly you need to let your midwife or someone close to you know so you can get the support and help you need. So this blog today is some tips and hints on how to prepare for baby number two!
1. When pregnant, Spend as much time as you can with Baby no.1. This may be easy for some mothers; and this may be hard for some mothers. Some work and some are SAHM! But when you get the chance, make sure you spend time to have some 1 on 1 with you child, whether that be 10 minutes or 1 day it can really make a difference. I always made sure that once a week at least to spend a couple hours with Rosie with just us two. We went to the park, went shopping or even just stayed at home and read some books. It really does not matter what you do. Your child will love whatever you choose to do and make then still feel important in your pregnancy!
2. (If they can) Let them come! When you have scans, or go shopping for baby clothes let them come! (If the hospital will allow you too). Getting to see your little tiny human on screen is the greatest feeling and your child may love it. This will make your child feel involved. Taking your eldest shopping with you to get baby stuff can really make your child feel involved. Letting them help you pick out outfits and little bits you may need. Obviously this may be difficult for some. But making your child feel involved can relieve some stress from you and you’ll also be spending some quality time with them!
3. Don’t worry! Your first baby is used to having you, and just you so there are chances they will get jealous. Who wouldn’t? but its NORMAL! They’ve spent their whole life having your attention solely on them and now there is a little bundle of competition and they might fight for your attention. Some children do it more than others. Rosie was only jealous for one day and that was when Miyah was about 3 days old and cluster feeding ALL day. I felt awful and Rosie didn’t want to cuddle me and that broke my heart but its normal. That is the only problem i have had with jealousy. After that i was determined to involve Rosie more involved (If that is even possible!)
What to do when Baby no.2 is here!
1) When baby no.2; include baby no.1! it will make them feel special! Including baby No.1 can make a big difference in the jealousy front. Obviously when you first come home you need to recover. But when you’re changing a bum, or feeding don’t just shoo your eldest away, let them watch you and let them help. Rosie used too (Before the novelty wore off of a new baby.) help me wipe Miayhs bum and she would stroke her head while i was feeding. Rosie would be really proud of herself that she helped me out. Rosie also LOVES to put Miyahs dummy back in her mouth if she starts to cry. She will come running to me telling me that she stopped Miyah from crying and she would be so proud. The simplest and smallest of tasks can make your eldest feel great. It really makes me smile when Rosie gets all excited and happy about helping.
2) Carry on spending that 1 to 1 with your eldest! I know full well that this is difficult when you have a tiny baby attached to you every couple hours for a feed or crying because, well their a newborn but it is still so important for you to spend 1 to 1 with your eldest. Honestly, it doesn’t have to be a lot. I will take 10 minutes out of my day to do a puzzle with Rosie or to let her do my hair. (Her favorite is me jumping on the trampoline with her lol!) They may not show it but this will be really good for the same reason before. They may not show it but it shows.
3) DO NOT STRESS! Please, try your hardest not to stress. You’re having another little human and that is amazing and im sure your eldest little human will love them too. If you are worried and it is making you stressed talk to someone. Your midwife/health visitor/partner and family! They can always help with your worries. Take time for yourself too, this is really important. Don’t overload yourself and make yourself poorly.
Having a second baby will always be hard. You’re not just looking after one life anymore and that IS scary. You want everything to be perfect and sometimes you dont feel that it will be but it will be okay. I have said in previous posts but if anyone needs any advice or just someone to talk too then you can always contact me. My social media names are below and you can always email me on @firstname.lastname@example.org.
Thank you for reading.